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I believe most people have different ideas for the meaning of unforgiveness , forgiveness and forgive .

What I mean is; it may not have the same meaning to everyone.  Let’s put all of us on one page, let’s define what unforgiveness means:

I think we all can agree with the Webster dictionary meaning of unforgiveness:  As unforgiving, unwilling or unable to forgive. Also, defines unforgivenes; as not disposed to forgive or show mercy; unrelenting.

Let’s take a look at the definition of forgiveness:

Forgiveness- To pardon, to give up, resentment of, or claim, to requital for, to grant relief.

The action or process of forgiving, or being forgiven- Pardon, absolution, exoneration, remission, dispensation, indulgence, clemency, mercy, reprieve, and amnesty.

Let’s take a look at the definition of forgive:

stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake.


pardon, excuse, exonerate, absolve, acquit, let off, grant an amnesty to, amnesty


What do Psychologists say:

Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness. ...Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offenses.


What does the Bible say about unforgiveness:

Bible Summary. A simple definition of unforgiveness is “a grudge against someone who has offended you”. Another definition of unforgiveness is not having the compassion to forgive. Unforgiveness is a sin that causes us to think and do evil things.

I believe we are now on one page,

Where am I going with this? You are not alone in this journey.

Who in this life hasn’t been hurt by someone’s words, or actions? Sometimes a big Band-Aid cannot help the pain or the healing process. The wound or wounds can leave lasting results, of feelings of resentment, and anger, and sometimes revenge, or get-back. 


Here are the 5 steps to forgiveness:

  • Identify why you have been struggling to forgive. Have you been making yourself the victim? ...

  • Be willing to forgive. ...

  • Release it. ...

  • Trust that healing will occur. ...

  • Be open for healing.


How does unforgiveness affect your health? It’s been said;                            


According to Harvard Medical School, not forgiving someone can impact both physical and mental
health. It can feel as if the person has gone through a major traumatic event. Forgiveness, on the other
hand, can lead to lowered blood pressure and a healthier heart.

Studies have shown forgiveness encourages decreased anxiety and depression and increases the ability
to improve your relationships. Forgiveness and healing have both an emotional and physical bond. They are
connected deep within you and it’s impossible to have one without the other.

a person who was unable to forgive themselves, they had an increase in depressive symptoms. They also had more anxiety
and a weaker immune system. When you forgive yourself, you can begin to heal in all areas of your life: mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.

How Your Mind and Body Benefit From Forgiveness

Learning to forgive has benefits that are far greater than we may think. Grudges are like toxins within
our emotions. When you learn to eliminate these toxins, your body begins to heal and return to
homeostasis (its natural state of balance).

Forgiving and healing are gifts we give to ourselves in the forms of internal peace and stability. From the
moment you begin the process of forgiving, your body starts healing. Forgiveness triggers healing

Forgiveness can also lead to higher self-esteem. It can allow you to have a greater spiritual connection. Being able to forgive helps you practice compassion.

Forgiveness is freeing. Yes, it frees the one who hurt you. But most importantly, forgiveness gives you
freedom from feeling negative emotion and being triggered, and from being a victim. It gives you the courage to move forward with your life, without a heavy weight on your shoulders.

Forgiveness Improves Your Mental Health

According to the American Psychological Association, when you forgive, your mental health improves.
Studies have shown that as forgiveness rises, stress levels go down. Forgiveness is also linked to fewer
symptoms of anxiety and depression.

It’s true: When you forgive, you release tension from your body. Tension that can cause physical ailments.
Forgiveness leads to lowered blood pressure and less stress. Because there is a connection between
blood pressure, stress and heart disease, you are reducing your risk for health problems down the road by practicing forgiveness right now.

Mental health problems can often lead to physical aches and pains. Depression, for example, is an illness
that leads to negative physical responses. Not being able to forgive creates symptoms of depression and
anxiety and therefore, leading to physical concerns.

When we refuse to forgive, our brains remain in a state of alertness that can lead to negative health
effects. You tend to stay focused on the pain you feel, creating stress and setting you up for further pain




stay; you can stay where you are.

Grow; you can receive the benefits from 4giving, because you broke the chains that had you bound.     

Move forward; you will be able to have peace and spiritual healing, and feeling free.


Chronic anger puts you into a fight-or-flight mode, which results in numerous changes in heart rate, blood pressure and immune response. Those changes, then, increase the risk of depression, heart disease and diabetes, among other conditions. Forgiveness, however, calms stress levels, leading to improved health.

Forgiveness: Your Health Depends on It - Johns Hopkins Medicine





The Power of Forgiveness


Please consider what you would need to achieve closure.


Will you decide with me that you want to change and need help?

I realize taking along look or an inventory of you it’s not an easy thing to do, 

Here are the 5 steps to forgiveness:

  • Identify why you have been struggling to forgive. Have you been making yourself the victim? ...

  • Be willing to forgive. ...

  • Release it. ...

  • Trust that healing will occur. ...

  • Be open for healing.


When you really forgive someone, you are making a decision to release, embrace, pardon, and grow. A Decision to Release.

What is the purpose of forgiveness?

Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself, to be at peace, to be happy and to be able to sleep at night. You're not doing this for them, you're doing it for yourself, to set yourself free from the feelings of hurt, ​anger and helplessness that kept both of you attached for so long, and to be at peace.


Why is forgiveness necessary?

Forgiveness kills bitterness and resentment. Forgiving someone else is freeing. It allows us to break those chains of thought that have been weighing us down. If you are not able to forgive someone, it forever becomes something that you cannot bear. Jun 20, 2017


How can I reach that point of wanting to forgive?

You can try to see the situation from the other person’s point of view. You can have empathy for that person so you can free yourself.

 Write your feelings down in a journal, and pray over the situation asking for strength. 

When you forgive it will loosen the hold on you and free you from the control the offender has on you. As it brings you a sense of peace inside that will help you continue your course in life.  

Remember if the other person doesn’t acknowledge they did anything wrong, you cannot change that person’s mind or that person, only they can change themselves.

Forgiveness frees us to live in the present, and not the past.

When one forgives someone there’s a feeling of being free, a feeling of lightness, no longer carrying a heavy burden, feeling weighted down to all your emotions.

You enter into a place of letting go of those heavy loads and having a new outlook.


Call us, and we will go over the scriptures with you. (918.764.8828).


When you forgive, you are taking away the power the wrongdoer wields over you and using that power toward your growth.

“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice.”
Ephesians 4:31
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